hh…

Why is it so hard to keep your opinions to yourself?

people have the tendency to urge others in agreeing with them. what was his point? are you a muslim or are you a Malaysian person? asking to a friend. ‘most people would think of themselves as a muslim first then a malaysian’ whats that suppose to mean? why is it everything he says its related to my believe and his comments reflect his unbelieveable-ness and how complicated our obligations are.

Islam is a religion. Malaysian is a nationality. ‘you cant compare an apple to orange’ my fren said-you can however compare green apple to red ones-I suppose. Anyway, point is..
Its not the flaw of the religion. It’s the flaw of the individuals. Maybe it’s the fact that Malaysian is populated originally of Malay race and as if the other two is seen as an invasion of whats theirs? I mean, if he loves Japan and facebook so much.. Okay, fine. But it unnecessary to persuade guys in class to see girls and try out drinking sakes in sakura season. There’s muslim guys also in class. Married ones some more.

Is it one of the factors that racism do exists in the world? You are being confronted with people who is not just different in believes and way of life but they are against you. Wondering how on earth could they not drink healthy mineral each minute of everyday for thirty days for more than 12 hours? How many times did he have to repeat how can people stand that..

Now I’m drifting off the point. but you know.. Its clear enough already the fact that you loathe twitter and worships facebook. But we also know twitter and facebook serves two different purpose, micro-blogging and social networking site. Whats wrong if people finds twitter not as boring as you but on the opposite-fun? Well, since you like to have people agrees, or find ones that are when some disagrees, and over again underlining and emphasizing such. A nod and a smile will keep things simple.

Conclusion. Some things are not absolute. They never will. Perspective and beliefs are things you wouldn’t want to be too involved in discussing. We can adapt. Acceptance we can give but nobody can force your heart out of something. Feelings are just as sacred as your beliefs. And I think most of us would like to have the freedom to feel out our hearts and left in peace with it.

hh.. so sensi these days. Something wrong with my cycle some more.

On Hiatus.

… until I can write a decent writing worth posting.

Down again?! No surprise..

Its been months and now two days in a row that apiit server is down therefore students cannot access the webspace at this very moment and last night.
When I asked the technicians about it all they said was ‘oh, the server down only’ only? is it so common that the problem is not being treated as serious as it should be. No wonder there isnt any more of those feedbacks forms you find hanging around in labs.simply too much complaints, no actions. Now worst than ever, it is considered a minor problem.

I had jot down my timetable for the week but this morning a friend told me he might have seen there’s another class going on right now, while me trying to access the timetable. I couldn’t even resume downloading slides from learnfinity as ‘the server down only’. pfft.

Anyway, just yesterday. I got a bargains on movie ticket (nomat) for transformer, a real nice handbag for my birthday buddy later in the week, kingmax stick 4 gig flash with real cute penskin only rm35!, sensonic 1600dpi mouse for rm15!) lol. sorry, I’m a sucker for cheap stuffs..
The thing was, once I got back, stupidly the bomba lift in A2 blok vista komanwel never what they say ‘in maintenance’ but rather ‘out-of-order’. So last night, as I wait for the one and only elevator left in -2 basement, took out a pen and wrote on the clean white paper notice, underneath Sorry for the inconvenience caused : “You Should Be”

So today, just got back from college and as I waited for the elevator I came across the lift upgrading process notice that I scribbled on yesterday, and found more scribbles ! Im like, what the-?? ROTFL. it was so hilarious seeing someone also bothered to note down their grumble in that very paper that I had to take this pic on my mobile !

hahah,, hopefully im not gonna be reported for vandalism. 0_o

midnight sun – twilight dedicated song

so, yea. im supposed to write an article as a contributor for this blog at the moment. started on two pieces, not quite finished..
hh.. so tiring today. First class, and was already bombarded with information. A mini-group FYP comin’, got ANOTHER same lecturer as previous module, I only look forward to being in class so I could make new friends

Anyway, I was looking through old archives.. and here goes another personal junk !

with every fiber of my being
only you, im afraid of losing
my soul is yours to dazzle
and a dead heart, frozen, still and humble

seeing you blush scarlet
knowing you’re alright,
it is my call, your day protector, your night watcher

someday,
you fragile human girl
skin soft pale as pearl
earn love and happiness that’s worth
I know your the only one for me
even when I’m not, for you

knowing I love you,
knowing your blood sings for me,
you were my reason to self loathe
too late now to even be sorry
the world voices whispers when yours speak my name
my existence now was just not same
you’re my exception
now that i see reason
I just have to yearn for you, ache for you
oh.. how I long for you

my midnight sun
without you I’m nothing, I feel nothing
you flip my world upside down
throughout my existence as a living being
warming up my heart making it beat again
recovering my internal bleeding
yes, Im alive

if I could dream
I would dream of you
I see it now, I’m finally awaken

If you never read the forth book from saga twilight, then the whole lyric would be meaningless..
This was submitted for a songwriting contest held on a twilight fan-based website.. might as well post it up.

…more exam than interview.

why the hell was i offered again???

i was happy busy organizing an event, reading novels, surf the web, and listen to music as usual. I dont need another internship offer flew (maybe accidently) to my inbox. gee, who was I kidding? I shouldnt have replied in the first place, come to the CTI incubator just to find a piece of paper with three questions that I had no idea of…

stupid software development module. I should’ve went to software engineering, not BIT. materials were too shallow. feels like ive wasted my whole 14 weeks. i wanna learn java and C++ too…

seriously pseudocode? but that was a language rite? I wish I hadn’t humiliated myself. Thankfully, the guy was friendly enough not to mock me directly
sigh. i thought i could fit in more to the multimedia rather than programming part.

Manny’s Project Proposal Tips

My results were out but I freaked on ARMPD (Applied Research Methods and Professional Development).

I loved the module.. =(

So (at first) I couldn’t accept the fact that I only got an upper second class for the assessment. Made me really down coz I failed in getting straight A’s for my level2. And the fact that the lecturer was the same one who taught us previous sem and gave (almost the whole class) distinctions as freebies, made me more disappointed. Or was it that kind of mindset, which made me try not hard enough?

Okay, so I dragged a bit in doing the 100% incourse.. and skipped classes coz it was dead boring IF Mr. Manimohan wasn’t the lecturer, plus me and the girls were having much more fun doing our group assignment drawing diagrams during the end of the semester *pleading eyes*. Maybe the fact that I annoyed her for 1) Not knowing there was a presentation 2) On that very day I decided to come to class 3) I found out later, the notice was made when I skipped class 3) I rushed with my slides and presented effortlessly. hmm.

Anyway,

Manny (the only one who got distinction) was kind enough to make some feedbacks on my assignment. Which I think, I need to share. =)

On Mon, Jun 15, 2009 at 9:09 PM, Manfred<*****@gmail.com> wrote:
>
>
>

I don’t know if this helps but

1. Indentation – for new paragraphs, TAB on starting of each para //
it eases the readers eye.

2. Consistency – Project Plan paragraphs justified ctrl+J //
documentation is very important because it reflects one’s
professionalism

3. Identify & Apply what you’ve learned in current module and other
module (missing risk assessment plan) cause lecturers would love to
see something that has been taught being applied – hence, giving them
impression you’ve picked up a skill/knowledge. This can further be
done with things that arent taught in module (extra stuff) like
business flow (OOM) & cost/benefit analysis that I”ve done (I think
that’s where I scored, Sandip did that too)

4. Points – point forms are meant to be short  (2-3 lines) // do not
go length elaboration, if u must do it below in new paragraph as
sub-chapter

5. Know what you’re doing – Proposal needs to have a strong executive
summary & conclusion (pointed out by Ms Thana – I have not been taught
by Ms Thana, this was told to me by a friend) because executives or
high ranked ppl will not have time to go thru all the whole proposal.
Therefore, ur exe summary & conclusion must be interesting.

5a Executive summary – give strong points but don’t elaborate them
here (do it in the proposal) build reader’s interest at first.
5b Conclusion – shouldn’t be what you’ve done overall but it should
have points and figures backed up by what you’ve researched/proposed
and justifiable points on why they should green-light your proposal
for implementation.

6. Numbering Chapters – you should do this so readers know where
they’re at for main chapters and sub-chapters (learn to use Heading 1
and 2 as you can auto generate ToContents)

Basically I think your assignment is not much different than mine
except the costing part (this is essential in any proposal just like
risk). I’ve been writing documentation since L1 and I know what is
COMPULSORY or OPTIONAL as I try to improve by reading others (like
yours now) so it’s a habit to beautify documentations – even tho your
points are not good enough (or high tech as others did) as long as
it’s simple, understandable and applicable – no one can judge that
you’re wrong because your points are stupid unless irrelevant. This is
better than doing some high-tech crap that even reader cant understand
and thus losing marks because msg cant conveyed properly. I always
always always put myself in the readers/examiners point of view when
writing.

p/s: ty for reading all my craps, it might or might not help but hope
you somehow get something out of it
pp/s: I was lucky to have friends guiding me and give me
tips/insights/motivation on how to write or what topics/lecturer to
look out for in each module (eg. RDSD’s normalization and Mr ****’s
two-faced nature) so I wouldn’t screw up badly.

Thanks Manny. Really appreciate it. Made me feel so much better now knowing where I’ve gone wrong, and luckier somehow-still managed getting credit. =P

Seeing is Believing

copas dr facebook notes :

Seeing is Believing – “Latian Aktor” 14/6

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Sunday, June 14, 2009 at 9:52pm | Edit Note | Delete

Where would you find people lying on the ground, flat, eyes-closed, being statues ? these actors weren’t bringing peace to their minds, neither are they focusing, and no—definitely not doing yoga. But turns out it was to retrieve that sense of feel to wake up as whole new identity. Just to rehearse, parking lots was a good enough place. But when the weather’s ugly, the open space under the highway in the middle of the road was the alternative.

Call that desperate. Not until you experience the whole session. Though only half the casts gathered, it was fiction-came-to-life. Every now and then, my face would get sprayed from rainwater but the performance distracts me. Seeing them make spontaneous dialogues, being a made-up character, bringing fiction to life.. it was a whole new level of creativity.

Again, seeing is believing. You might find me exaggerating, but only when you witness for your selves you can agree that these bunch have the talent. impressive. Makes me think “Are they really amateurs?”

And just like that, it changed my perspective.

Though Batavia final verdict has not been out yet, (hell who knows when its even being discussed by the board members). I believe we have concealed talents thats yet to be explored. The drama rehearsals are one factor strong enough sustaining the event. Now that I knew actors weren’t just reading scripts, but learning from basic theatres to becoming the character themselves through out practice sessions.

Dance performances are on the road, since ages ago. We have terrific dancers as instructors. One that “wow”-s the audience on Indonesian Independence. The team even have members request for sessions. Others are so well organized, they even come up with documented version of transformation and moves. (And yes, were still looking forward to the dance moves video to be uploaded ) Now are we really gonna let the potentials slips out of our hands?

Now I know some has drawbacks and negative experience for this. But let’s not dwell on the past and take aside all kinds of personal issues. From ground-up we need synchronization. Not only right person, but right set of mind. If you assume that the event is not gonna keep up, well.. I really-really-extremely-feel sorry for you. You can back-off, but miss out on a LOT of things. maybe you’re right, maybe you’re wrong. Optimism is always the one who brought rewards for those that possesses them. It may be intangible, but they’re there…

So, just to remind those who are committed to this team. Mailing lists are for communication purpose. cheap, fast and accurate. That’s why we don’t have meetings, meetings will be held to sum up progresses and appoint new directions. Well currently, we all have directions but do we act on it?

Take todays gathering for example. Admin department were invited to join “Latian actor”. Why on earth-? Well first of all, they needed moral support. Outsiders watching brings new motivation and a sense of being needed. secondly, ‘outbound’ or ‘gathering’ wasn’t at all what it was expected, since too little came. We had an agenda to talk about the project breakdown evaluation where all department head was required. Sigh. I guess in the end, a door-to-door communication will be necessary.
And don’t give that “he/she-never-came..”,”… the members weren’t even complete last time why should I come now..”-look. Where’s the end to that? Our age is more than mature to take full responsibility of what we’re involved in. Okay, maybe its not the age. Just us. No supervisors, no counsellors like we used to had during high school. Just us, as ourselves.

FYI, project manager has already emphasized on welcoming critics. But if some kept to themselves, who is expected to read their minds? I know this from the fact that I am newbie in organization, and a-z I I don’t understand is conveyed directly which eliminates any possibilities of misunderstanding.

Now lets live up to the potential and utilize the opportunities. Straighten out doubts; get our heads in the game, give it our best shot. All involved plays important part in making this a hit. Be the initiator. Spread out the spirit. With one of the majority population of students in APIIT comprises those from AUISS. This is bound to survive. And if we live up the will within us, it is also bound to be a huge one. This is THE one event where AUISS can gain recognition. And the one event, where should it fails.. will impacts those our juniors and their attempt in producing similar production.

enough said. lets see if facebook can be a new effective communication channel. ^^V

p.s updates available at: http://groups.google.com/group/batavia2009 check back often.

repriorotizing

Yesterday, after my last class I got on to the 6 o’clock bus. All the time, watching the jammed traffic on my way back to my apartment, talking with my friends when I got home, got all excited to redo my project title which was rejected because its too broad, through all the mental preparation I had in shower, I got out and took out the things I had in my back pack that day, planning to spend my night doing research I found that I had the laptop but not the charger.

Then it struck me. I hadnt noticed that I didn’t packed up my battery charger from the time our class had ended cause I thought I needed it for the group meeting which was canceled and made me forget all about it. Well you know the rest. I got all panicky, got in a cab straight to college, even interrupted a class just to look for the cable dangling or lying around somewhere just like I had pictured in my mind..

No luck. I knew it. I knew it will be happening soon. Another disaster just as I thought. And again, it happened never the way that I imagined it. I had a theory about that ‘what one expects to happen sometimes just don’t happen because you thought about it first.’ Things happen in a way that jumps you and caught you unaware.

I was lost for words.. I knew I had been fooling around with my time and sometimes too distracted to bother doing something sensible and urgent. Like get on with my college life. I had skipped classes. I never did my homework on time let alone put some time and thought into it. I havent been working for almost three and a half weeks in the library. All that just puts me in a lazy mode. Irresponsible. The worst yet, I missed my dawn prayer two days in a row since I stayed up late watching movies.

I could recall a bit of my memory on how I asked Allah SWT to remind me on how to put my priorities back in order. I knew it at the time, I needed a good smack on the face. Alert me to make use of my life properly and with balance.

And that was it, obviously. No charger, no computer. No computer, no internet. No distractions. No crawling on blogs, youtubes, facebook, google.. endlessly. I had time to read the paper, read my borrowed library books, talk with my friends, and observe things happening surrounding me. Suddenly I envy those who had no laptop. The only time they sit infront of a computer is when they had exactly what they needed all set and planned out. Begin with a clear end in mind is one of the 7 highly effective habits (Covey, 1989). Otherwise, people-like me-tend to spend their day, drifting off to whatever they feel like doing, unfocused to an extent.

I think-maybe-that I do have solution for my addictness to surfing the net. Is it possible for one to limit their time spent browsing the internet to just an hour at most? Yes, if one allow themselves to try I guess. Hopefully I can get to my goals quickly and efficiently. Bismillah..

My friends were very supportive. Surprisingly the most was from my classmate who I hadn’t known to be so concerned about my feelings. How very lucky those who hangs out with people like him. My gratitude had swollen in an overnight from the experience.

Anyhow, the next morning I found it. Picked up by a cleaner, passed to the guards, passed to the receptionist. I had tried the classroom, resource lab, and admin last night already. Even the receptionist herself that morning hadn’t seen. Only until I got the guards and cleaners convince the lady what they’d done with it, I finally saw my long lost item. Guess consistency pays off as they say it would.

Thank you God for blessing me with this incident.

project idea.. plz show up!

I had come up with my project specification for my chosen title which turned out to be too broad. I suppose it was more to a topic than a title. The proposed project was about analysing niche marketing field, finding out what trends of web-based applications implementation in businesses nowadays, predict what technologies needed to enhance that one feature which allows them to reach out their potential buyers, and to develop that as an online solution to a random company doing niche marketing. That was it, though. I assume that was reason my project title is rejected today. I did not have an exact idea of what kind of problem I should be solving. Thinking that while researching on the companies I might eventually have an idea of a new IT related system to be developed in order to improve the businesses I might come across with. Actually the idea was what the project supposed to be all about. I see that now.

I managed to know these things after consulting with my lecturer:

1. My problem is vague. I need to have a precise idea on WHAT I want to improve on using information technology.

2. THE idea has to be a solution to a business problem where IT role is a major supporting factor.

3. The domain niche market is too broad. I have to select a company in order to reveal the problem the business face.

4. Thus, requiring intensive domain research on niche marketing.

5. Also, research on creating web applications, the technical aspects itself. Meanwhile considering point#1 again, emphasizing on a new enhancement that never existed or thought of before.

This is it. The challenge. This is the lump on a flat ground my lecturer mentioned the other day. The hardest part, indeed. Where do I get the inspiration? A project title that is interesting, feasible and meet the expectations of my own course requirement?

does it really take a whole search party to look for an idea...?

insignificant, pessimist.. me.

So here’s the catch:

I’m in this production committee for BATAVIA* as the assistant producer, basically doing what a secretary and personal assistant does. I applied for decoration department, but ended up being one in the main committee. Which is good and sucked at the same time..

It was surprisingly a challenging position, writing out proposals, official letters, and those other formal written stuffs cause it was like a burden on your shoulders knowing that important people reads them and what you write have to represent what those higher level people above you demands.

But it was as if I had to read their minds though. I wasn’t well informed about their progress—although I tried to update myself as necessary—and decisions, let alone be involved in one. But bam! suddenly out of nowhere I was given a task to write this, that with deadlines (hell, I had to give up two classes altogether today) and that was surprisingly time consuming.

I feel insignificant for the most part. I was never told the progress about anything I wrote. What is missing, what needs to be fixed, any feedback.. none. I was dead curious about how the founder’s signature request coming along for the official letter. Actually, I was curious about a lot of things that was unexpected or unplanned. I had to scream myself ‘in’ and shut up my mental idiotic question like “what’s going on?”, “why isn’t it allowed again?” , “what happened with their decision to.. “ ugh. Makes me feel so itchy like I literally crave scratching out the information from their seemed-to-be silent heads myself!

Sigh. Again, maybe this is just about me. No one felt like I needed to be involved. No one thinks my decision making is in level and coherent with theirs. But how can they.. If I get pessimist quickly. I even swallowed whole of what one of the SARC members had said. Forgetting once, this is us. Indonesian students, talented and cooperative individuals known for their creativity in problem solving. We are high-spirited brotherhood. Independent. We differentiate and make things happen..

...proposed batavia logo

* BATAVIA (Ballad of APIIT-UCTI Through All Variety of Indonesian Arts) is a drama musical theatre adapted from the well-known classic love story of Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare. This world famous drama will be presented in a unique Indonesian version performed by both Indonesian and foreign students of APIIT-UCTI. The production composed of diverse features from all across exquisite Indonesian cultures, bringing together a never before reality-based play.

Narrated in English, the performance is packed with the familiar twisted love conflict where divergence perplexed over a dispute. The drama emphasizes on its role portrayal from all races, implying on their behaviours and exquisite dialog accents in between the various traditional dances. Live ethnic music will be performed also by none other than the Indonesian community themselves, entertaining both students and public audience. Provided subtitle screens and minimal dialogs, moreover, the art of acting along with body gestures will express well the intention to deliver a universal memorandum of morality—Unity in Diversity.